Just let them be

    The other day, I was having a discussion with a friend who is planning to adopt a baby girl. She has been facing stiff opposition from parents on both sides. Now she and her husband are finally ready to bring the baby home. One of the parents says "We have been dreading the day that you would give us this sad news". It made me really angry at that time to hear this. I mean aren't this couple doing something good? How many people have the courage and open heartedness to accept someone into your family in this way. But this post is not about my frustration or my rant.
    We as parents always have expectations from our children. However hard we may try not to show it or express it. But what about their expectations from us. Wouldn't they want us to be able to understand them?  Let them be a certain way if that's what gives them happiness? So I have thought of all kinds of situations that my son would or could probably come up with that might cause distress in me. And honestly right now all I can say is that unless he hurts another person or thing (like murder, rape or steal) I would stand by him. Just let him be. Let him take his decisions. I know he might not always do things that please me. I would explain the pros and cons to him as I know it (I don't know about everything and my opinion needn't be right either). And then would let him take the decision himself.
    I don't know if it is the right or wrong way of parenting but this is the I am planning to do it. And I do it knowing that it won't be easy.